StressedI’m feeing stressed these days. Smooshed, I guess. I’m in a busy season at work, in the middle of a remodel, planning a visit to see the kidults, starting grad school (yep!), and it seems that Mom has more needs than usual. Seems like she’s having more doctor appointments, and I can’t make them all anymore. She needs to have foot surgery, and I need to schedule at least a Thursday/Friday to be with her until my brother can come and take the weekend shift. I look at my calendar and there is no margin. No time to make the drive and go. I’m trying to not stress out over this, but truly, folks, tonight I’m feeling smooshed.
It’s hard for me to tell on the phone how she’s doing. She’s busier than she has been able to be in a long time. That’s good. But there is a deep sadness, a loneliness, that won’t be gone for a long time. And on the phone, I can’t tell what’s normal grief and what’s something to be concerned about. And of course, she won’t tell me the truth.
So, I think I’ll go read a book. The house is too torn up to do much else.