Don’t Forget Your Mate
If you’re a bona fide Gen Sandwicher, with children at home and parents to care for, you’ll enjoy a book I just received. What Happy Parents Do: The Loving Little Rituals of a Child-Proof Marriage by Carol J. Bruess, Ph.D. & Anna D.H. Kudak, M.A. offers short, pithy suggestions to build, maintain, or resurrect a strong and loving marriage relationship as your family expands. While it’s aimed at parents of young children, many of the suggestions are equally effective for those of us “parenting” our parents, whether or not you have children at home.The book encourages you to develop loving little rituals—those predictable, steady, and soothing, activities that can set and re-set the tone of a marriage. It will inspire you to cool your conflict and heat up your romance by developing durable and dependable ways of shifting your attention from your kids to one another.
The authors quote couples who have developed these rituals, then offer their own comments. Peppered throughout the book are full page reminders, artistically presented on brown, beige, or turquoise pages almost suitable for framing. One such reminder is perfect for Gen Sandwichers: “Do quiet the external noise so you can tune in to each other and to your marriage.”
I have several people on my Christmas list who would benefit from this little book. It’s artistically designed and printed on glossy paper, making it a beautiful gift book.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Marriage and Caregiving
Christianity Today’s Marriage Partnership offers a series of articles focusing on marriage relationships for Gen Sandwichers, especially those who have taken on the responsibility for their aging parents. It’s a long post, with several articles on the page, but well worth the read if you are struggling with balancing parents and marriage.Labels: aging parents, caregivers, marriage, sandwich generation
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Protect your Marriage
In an article entitled “The Cluttered Nest Syndrome,” Sheri & Bob Stritof, offer nine tips for maintaining a successful intergenerational household. They suggest that clear communication and self-care are essential for Gen Sandwichers.I find that even though my parents live several hours away, the time and emotional energy required to keep up with their needs puts stress on our marriage. My husband always knows when I’ve had a difficult conversation with Mom. It’s important to know what you can handle and what your spouse can handle. I’m still learning to set boundaries and not become enmeshed with my parents’ issues. It’s not easy, but it is essential. And healthy. And it’s OK.
Labels: marriage, sandwich generation