Sandwich Generation --a triple decker
My step dad has been in the hospital since Thursday, the same day I left for an important professional conference. It was, of course, a dilemma to decide if I should leave after spending a small fortune to be there or go stand by my mom. She insisted that she didn’t need me, but I wasn’t sure. You know, the eldest, responsible Gen Sandwicher. I prayed and considered my options and then called his daughter, explaining that I really couldn’t get away, but she might want to stay in touch. My brother was willing to go, but Mom said she was fine.Unfortunately, cell coverage at the retreat center where I was is terrible and Mom is hard of hearing, so I could hear her, but she couldn’t hear me. So she had to call my husband and give him the information, and then I’d call him and get it, except that he couldn’t hear me. Challenging.
I haven’t been able to talk to Dad's doctor, but the prognosis doesn’t sound good. Looks like pneumonia plus who knows what else. So for now it’s a day by day. I may be here for Easter; I may be there. And of course, our son and DDIL are coming up so we need to balance kidults and aging parents--and profession. Feeling a little smooshed here.
Labels: aging parents, Kidults, sandwich generation
4 comment(s):
Tough choices and split committments. Our moms are 89 and 90, with the problems that go along with aging. We are planning a major trip out of the country in Nov. That was a hard decision. But there will always be conflicts of some kind. And this opportunity won't come along again. It isn't a vacation, but more of a working trip, but optional.
By
LoieJ, at
7:44 AM
Yes, these are tough choices. And it gives me a lot to think about for my own life and aging.
By
Pat, at
10:31 PM
I cared for seven elders over two decades. Much of that time, my youngest son had severe health problems. I frequently had to make gut-wrenching choices between a sick child and needy elders. Then, of course, I needed to remember my healthy son - he had needs, too.
Your description of the cell-phone fiasco reminded me of my years caring for Joe, my totally deaf neighbor. He would talk, I would write, then we'd call his son and I would "translate." Always a challenge - often fun.
You've got a good blog. Keep up the good work. Carol
By
Anonymous, at
5:42 AM
Carol, seven in 20 years! Amazing! You should be writing this blog! Feel free to guest blog anytime! I think you qualify as an expert. And you have certainly earned some jewels in your crown. Thanks for the compliment. Blessings!
By
Pat, at
3:52 PM
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