Beware of Visitors (Part 2)
Me:
"You did what?"
Mom:
"Just a little. And I had my foot against the door so I could slam it if I
needed to."
She had
thought of everything... My mom is 5'4" and just over 100 pounds. She also
has peripheral neuropathy and is unstable on her feet. I reminded her of the
size and strength of her delinquent great nephew, whom she fears.
Me:
"Do you really think you could keep him out with your little foot? He
could push that door open with one hand and knock you over! What were you
thinking?
Mom:
"I know... I know..."
But does
she know? How do get her to think more clearly? To think in terms of safety?
Maybe I
don't.
Obviously
I don't.
Maybe
it's time to consider moving her to assisted living. She's right at that in
between stage--too active for assisted living, but not quite safe on her own.
The wrong decision could be devastating.
What
would you do?
4 comment(s):
Assisted living is actually better when they are more on the active side. If you wait until she really needs it, at that point they lack the ability to cope as well. If you transition before they really need it they have the coping mechanisms still intact that make for a better transition. I worked in a community for a while and this is what I observed from the residents there.
By
liberrtee, at
4:24 PM
Yes, I've heard that as well. But she is so afraid of losing her independence. She's even having problems with the household help we've brought in a couple of times per months. Thinks we are taking away her independence rather than buying her freedom. It's sad. I hope I'm more open when I'm older.
By
Pat, at
9:32 PM
Encourage her to explore the options! the more capable she is the easier the transition. My mother in law decided to go into an independent/ assisted living facility and she practically runs the joint!!! She gets people to exercise,is responsible for a Tuesday evening current event chat and is having a ball. As a marriage and family therapist, and having moved multiple people into situations that were in their best interest, my advice is to get a professional consultation that can assess what is in her and your best interest.
By
Laura Rothafel, at
8:13 PM
Laura, makes sense to me. But she's so afraid of giving up her freedom. And she sees it as giving up rather than making a better decision.
By
Pat, at
11:09 PM
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