Cleaning Out
While at Mom’s last week, we focused on some safety issues. If you’re a Gen Sandwicher, you might want to check these next time you visit your parents.We cleaned out the pantry and freezer. Mom is a Depression child, and still has a Depression mentality. She shops at the dollar store and is always picking up “good deals” on sale. However, her appetite isn’t what it used to be, so she eats far less than when her husband was living at home. In fact, she still buys foods that he liked but that she won’t eat. Her pantry was packed with expired foods and many things she knew she’d never eat, and most of the food in the freezer had freezer burn. We gave items that were still good to my sister and brother. Unfortunately, we tossed a lot.
We cleaned out expired meds. She still had a lot of prescription bottles from my step dad. Many of them were years out of date, as were many of hers. Her mobile home park has a recycling program where they dispose of some and send others overseas. I’m not sure about this, but hopefully it’s managed by a pharmacist.
We started cleaning out her closets. Here again the Depression mentality was prominent. Mom has clothes in at least three sizes, all co-mingled in the closet. Many of them were worn out years ago, but “you never know” when she might need them. She wasn’t willing to part with much, but we did get rid of two pair of bright orange pants and some sweaters that are now too heavy for her frail frame. This will be a progressive task, but we did free a little space for her and put together a few new combinations for her.
Many of our parents have a tendency to hoard “just in case.” It’s hard for them to let go of their “stuff.” I think that in addition to the Depression mentality, letting go of stuff reinforces their frailty and mortality. Of course, I should talk. I’m not eager to part with my stuff either.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Deal with your STUFF
I‘ve been reading about baby boomers having to deal with the hoards of stuff that their parents have been hoarding for the past 50 or more years. Stuff that our generation has the “privilege” of disposing of. It’s really hitting home with meWhen my mother in law died, she had more stuff than I’ve ever seen. We’d find layer after layer of stuff, one behind the other. There were items of value among boxes or shelves of junk. Fortunately, my sister-in-law usually knew the difference and knew when to have something appraised. It took four of us three months almost full time to clean out her house. And unfortunately, in the end, we brought a lot of stuff here—and it’s still here. I keep trying to get my hubby to dispose of it. After 11 years, if we haven’t used it we probably don’t need it.
In fact, I’ve been giving a lot of thought to our “stuff” and what our kids will do with it. We’ve hit gridlock at our home, and I often joke that when we die, our kids will never speak to us again when they have to sort through all of the STUFF.
One thing I’m starting to do is take pictures of those things that have either monetary or sentimental value for us. I’m putting together a binder with the photos and the stories so they’ll know what to look at twice.
Mom-in-law had a lot of wonderful items. Depression glass, jewelry, silver. Things I had never seen. Things we didn’t know she had. Now I regularly use those things. I don’t want my kids going through my stuff saying, “I didn’t know she had that!” I would rather they say, “Oh, I remember how Mom loved this. Now we’ll enjoy it.”
And if I’m not enjoying it, I owe it to them to get rid of it.
Labels: Baby Boomers, stuff